Wednesday, October 1, 2014


a whirlpool of thoughts have been flooding my mind recently and they've taken the forms of verbal diarrhea, long social media posts, erratic surfing behavior and never-ending conversations. There has been a change, however subtle, but still evident, at least to myself.

Perhaps entering the working world has changed me, and perhaps being more relaxed and stress-free has changed me. It comes to the surprise of many that I am
Actually an introvert. It's a conundrum that I find it hard to explain and difficult for others to understand, but I will try to explain it now.

Many perceive me as an outgoing personality, because I (generally) do not fear social situations. I face very minimal anxiety when I meet new people, and I barely experience panic when I have to talk to a new group of people. Therefore, when I meet new people, i warm up very quickly and blend in relatively well within a short time. Because I feel strongly for many things and am very much an opinionated individual, I never am short of things to say/share in a conversation. In all, I find it easy to start an participate in conversations, and I am thankful for that.

Having said that, many find it shocking when I share that I am actually pretty introverted. Meaning, although I have no issues joining conversations and interacting with others, I actually like being alone most of the time. I like to read, bake, write, run. They all involve me-time. I find it a huge drag to arrange meet ups just for the sake of 'catch-ups' because.... It takes a lot of motivation to keep conversations ongoing for an afternoon.

and I've been changing I've found myself enjoying conversations more, because they connect me with people. I've found myself initiating meet-ups more, because I simply want to. I want to share my experiences with people and I want to hear stories from other people. And this is a huge change, because I used to feel a lack of need to share, even though I still take a huge interest in what people share with me. Conversations have become energizing instead of painful for me, and I've found them more meaningful.

It's interesting how this change has evolved, and perhaps it's because I used to be so burnt out that little energy was left to devote to such aspects. Now that I've so much less to be busy with, I've more time to pursue more exciting things that I become more excited to share with others about. Now that I'm seeing my friends less, spending time with them becomes so much more vital.

It's a healthy change, and I'm happy about it. Work-life balance is a bitch to attain and I'm thankful for the circumstances in in which makes it easy to achieve at the moment. We are all so afraid of changes. People change, situations change, and we tend to think that changes are often negative. For me, this is a positive change.a healthy, happy one. So thank god for the change.

No comments:

Post a Comment